Inspired Idea

19 Dec

My favorite teaching buddy Linda Lemkin shared this with me and her other friends.  Thank you, Bubbe.  I taught my students to try to help someone daily because as Wayne Dyer said, “You cannot help someone else without helping yourself.”  My former students will remember this.  So here is Ann Curry from NBC News with a wonderful idea.

Inspired to act: #26Acts of kindness to honor those lost in Newtown, Conn.
By Ann Curry, NBC News

Newtown’s heartbreak has a lot of us asking, “What can I do?” Thinking about this, I took to Twitter and asked people to imagine what would happen if all of us committed to 20 acts of kindness to honor each child lost in Newtown. I added, “I’m in. If you are, RT #20Acts.”

Tens of thousands of people on Twitter and Facebook not only seized the idea, they increased it to #26Acts, to include the heroic teachers, and are launching acts of kindness big and small all over America. The acts are spreading overseas, including one tweeted from Borneo.

America’s Answer to the Tiger Mother, How to Raise Successful, Happy Children Press Release

17 Dec

MYSTIC, CT –  Written in response to the highly controversial Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua, Carol Cooke, a career American educator, offers what she terms an “American parenting model.”  Her book,  America’s Answer to the Tiger Mother, How to Raise Successful, Happy Children (ISBN 1475053916) presents a model that sharply contrasts Chua’s Chinese style of parenting.  Suggesting Chua would agree, Cooke describes the deterioration over the past three to four decades in the “motivation, performance, behavior, and moral compass” of America’s children creating a crisis which now extends well beyond just the field of education. Cooke believes it would be an understatement to say that education and the direction in which youth are headed in America today are in crisis. While she sees this as a concern Amy Chua no doubt shared, her strategies for teaching “self-motivation, self-discipline and self-reliance” are in sweeping contrast to the Tiger Mother’s methods.

As a result of her observations throughout her years of work with students, parents and teachers, Cooke concluded that it was not the American educational system replete with its more highly educated teachers, better equipped facilities, extensive resources, special programs and community services that was the primary source of the problem.  She concluded that the greater contributing factor was the other most significant influence on children’s lives: their parents, more specifically, unskilled parents. She asserts that all parents want to raise their children to be both successful and fulfilled.  Their problem simply is that they don’t know how. “It became apparent to me that throughout our history, we have neglected what is probably the most critical area of education for a society: teaching our citizens to be good parents,” says Cooke.

This book is designed to appeal to parents and parents-to-be of all ages, races, cultures, and socio-economic levels. Using her multi-faceted experience, the veteran educator presents parents with what she calls an American style of parenting to teach young children critical attributes, such as self-respect, character, integrity, self-discipline and compassion, as well as skills like goal setting, higher level thinking, and the art of making friends. Cooke’s work focuses less on how we should treat our children, and much more on what we should teach them.

 America’s Answer to the Tiger Mother, How to Raise Successful, Happy Children is available for sale online at americasanswertothetigermother.com, amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com,  and other channels.

About the Author:

Carol Cooke has had extensive experience within the field of education in positions ranging from classroom instruction and curriculum coordination to administration, teacher evaluation, and professional development consultation. Her goal has always been to help children become the best that they can be. She has worked with parents and children to improve relationships, to promote self-disciple and to enhance learning. She created a program to assist teachers in improving the self-image of children and has written resources to assist teachers in incorporating higher level thinking activities into every subject in the curriculum. Cooke has trained teachers and administrators from various states and has spoken at national conferences.

Advice to Parents on Newtown Tragedy

17 Dec

Today, I was at the Christmas/Hanukkah piano performance of my granddaughter, Sydney, who is an 8-year-old in the 3rd grade.  Her mother told me that a candlelight vigil was being held tonight on the green in Colchester for the Newtown families.  She said she would like to attend the vigil, but that Sydney had not heard about the tragedy yet.  She asked my opinion about whether or not she should be told and taken to this event.  My recommendation was, and is, that if elementary school age children can be shielded from the knowledge of this disaster, they should be.  Small children want us to explain the sources of their fears so that they can understand and cope.  None of us can explain this senseless act of violence.  Adults around the world are weeping in bewilderment and grief.  How can we expect our little ones to comprehend and deal with it?  The last thing we want is for our children to lose their sense of security and fear for their very lives while in school.

Middle school age children will have heard about Newtown’s tragic events if not from the news, then from their friends.  Their chain of communication is probably the most highly efficient on the planet.  If they are older siblings to elementary age kids, they should be asked to keep their knowledge from their younger brothers and sisters.  In school, however, they will want to talk about it.  I would not suggest that teachers bring up the subject in class.  However, if students do, it cannot be ignored.  A brief discussion of mental illness and its rare but sometimes tragic consequences is sufficient.  Dwelling on this disaster will not benefit anyone.  The sooner kids can get back to the usual routine in school, the sooner their innate resilience will kick in.  Those who have difficulty coping will no doubt be directed to counseling.  I am sure that all schools in Connecticut, and throughout the country for that matter, will be offering these services to children in need.

If younger children do hear about events in Newtown, the best piece of advice I have seen comes from Fred Rogers.   I thank my friend Joyce Christianson who shared this with all her FB friends.

‎”When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of ‘disaster,’  I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers – so many caring people in this world.”

-  Mister Rogers

Still Thinking

16 Dec

Reblogged from What Matters Most:

Click to visit the original post

I can't sleep. I lay here thinking about the young children in Connecticut that witnessed such horrible evil today. I think about them also unable to sleep tonight. I think of them laying in their beds with little minds replaying the horrors they have seen, over, and over and over again. I think of their parents who now must face the most challenging questions that parents must face.

Read more… 214 more words

Newtown Tragedy

16 Dec

Like so many other Americans, I watched in horror as the Newtown killings were reported.  As one of Connecticut’s residents, this is far too close to home for us.  However, I think all Americans feel the same numbing shock that we do.

Whatever was driving Adam Lanza’s tortured mind, it clearly was complex and had an accumulation of contributing factors.  How much was genetic, chemical, related to his upbringing, his life experiences, or other influences, we will probably never know.  One thing I know, however, is that as a society, we need to begin to nurture our children in such a way that they can grow into healthy, wholesome young people rather than angry, agonized victims of their toxic environment.  To paraphrase Ben Franklin, we teach people to be just about everything, except what they will probably become . . .  parents.

Our children’s most potent saviors are their parents, but only if those parents are skilled in supporting, disciplining, and guiding them to become sound, enduring, and fulfilled young people.  It’s time we begin creating the most precious commodity beyond our beautiful children themselves, and that is effective parents.

We must begin to train young people to be skillful, effective, parents long before they become parents. This means we must teach them the best practices in parenting in secondary schools, colleges, and universities. Young people should be able to major in this area of study at the university level.  If we can create the invaluable commodity of skillful, effective parents, maybe one day, these horrific tragedies and millions of other lesser ones will come to an end.

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